I love tiny living. (I love tiny houses; I love watching queer YouTubers transform vintage Airstreams; I love container homes; I love the idea of condensing your life to make it more manageable.) But there’s an undefined line in the sand that exists between it and practicality that is hard to define.

This is, however, until an example said boundary beams through an iPhone or Macbook Pro screen. Case in point: A listing was recently posted on Zillow for a demure, prison-like space in Lower Nob Hill that’s about twice the size of the average jail cell in an American penitentiary.

At 116 square feet in size — a space that measures roughly 10'x12'— the studio apartment at 698 Bush Street, Unit 405, is one of the smallest living spaces to come onto the market in recent memory. Worse? It’s $1,500 a month. Even worse? It only includes a wet bathroom; the shower head hangs over the toilet.

W hile this isn’t an example of an SRO (Single-Room Occupancy) unit, which often measure less than 100 square feet and are considered the last vestige of quasi-affordable SF housing, it’s jarring to find such an entrapping apartment on the market at this price.

(I was fortunate enough to find a rent-controlled 160-square-foot SRO for $1,100 during the “pandemic pricing” spell of 2021. The unit I currently dwell in was initially put on the market for $1,800/month — a criminally high price — before Covid-19 entered our collective lexicons. It sat there for a month at that price. Then it was lowered to $1,499. Orchestra of crickets. For a single month, the listing was edited to reflect “special pricing” at $1,099. I pounced like a snow leopard onto a mountain goat... because I could justify the price for the space [within the context of San Francisco’s livability].)

T he list penned by SF Bay Rental Company notes that the kitchenette features a “stone countertop, stainless sink, mini fridge, and modern cabinets,” though no oven or stovetop is included. The living space itself can be swallowed by an unhinged murphy bed — but a “high-end” one, at least.

The self-described compact wet bathroom features “modern fixtures and shower.” What my eyes can’t unsee isn’t ironically the shower curtain rail placed over the toilet, but the frosted-over bathroom doors walling off the living space.

Oh, and that kitchen sink? Good luck fitting anything larger than a mixing bowl inside.

On a salary of $60,000 a year, most financial experts recommend spending no more than 30% of your monthly gross income on housing expenses. This works out to $1,500 per month — the same rental price for this unit that would be considered inhumane and exploitive in most cities.

In San Francisco, we’ve grown numb to such examples. The pandemic’s rental plunge to somewhat digestible prices proved only temporary. A thin piece of gauze over the machete wound that is the city’s state of affordable housing.

Will SF bleed out? I mean, people are still leaving in droves (though good riddance to the six-figure, 20-something-year-old techies who came here chasing a check, rather than a cultural bastion). More likely, the housing bubble is going to pop first before then.

Either way, this abode is no place to spend the end of days inside at such a steep price.

Celebrating the free-wheeling spirit of the Bay Area — one sentence at a time.

SF transplant, coffee shop frequent; tiny living enthusiast. iPhone hasn’t been off silent mode in nine or so years. Editor of The Bold Italic.